Many of my friends are proud operators of personal Pandora Radio stations. I hadn't listened to mine for some time, and I decided to re-visit my station in light of the type of distraction for which I was searching while outlining for my "Civil Procedure" course...
I quickly remembered my instant fascination with the "Music Genome Project." For those of us with an expansive musicial pallate, Pandora allows us to explore, but also it allows us to explain to ourselves what exactly ties our rhythms together.
I'll invite Pandora users to compare this list (from about an hour worth of play on my station) to their own. I suggest to those who have not yet discovered Pandora to check it out.
What do I have to say for myself? I dunno. It's clear that I grew up on rock-music. I always described my selections as "complex" music, however (I struggle with most acoustic music, for example, and LOVE stringed instruments). I have a slight bias toward male vocalists. I like multi-genre, mixed instrumentation music--I enjoy melody or music that I can move to--and lyrics matter.
What's on your (actual or future) station?
Who's Gonna Save My Soul? Gnarls Barkley.
Modern R&B stylings, electronia roots, blues influences, mild rhythmic syncopation and minor key tonality.
See Me Fall. Mic Burns (Matthew DeKay and Productors Remix).
Four-on-the-floor beats, trance influences, disco influences, house influences, and danceable beats.
Dirty Harry. Gorillaz.
Basic rock structures, electronia influences, rap influences, reggae influences, and heavy use of vocal harmonies.
Stellar. Incubus.
Pop metal qualities, electronia influences, a subtle use of vocal harmony, repetitive melodic phrasing and mixed acoustic and electric instrumentation.
Got Your Money. Ol' Dirty Bastard.
Club rap roots, east coast rap roots, party jam style, danceable beats and syncopated beats.
*By the way I "disclaim" these lyrics.
The Whole World. Outkast.
Club rap roots, southern rap roots, electronia influences, rock influences and party jam style.
Remind Me. Royksopp.
Rock influences, danceable beats, straight drum beats, a smooth male vocal and a laid back male vocal.
Storm. Andrea Wellard.
Basic trock structures, a prominent rhythm piano part, repetitive melodic phrasing, extensive vamping and mixed acoustic and electric instrumentation.
Trio Sonata for 2 Violins. Antonio Vivaldi.
Baroque style, a small chamber ensemble, a featured cello, harpsichord, and violin.
Changes. Tupac.
R&B influences, danceable beats, violent lyrics, lyrics with a political message and melodic part writing.
Is This Desire? PJ Harvey.
Mellow rock instrumentation, blues influences, punk influences, repetitive melodic phrasing and mixed acoustic and electric instrumentation.
The hour rounded out with Nas's "Hip Hop is Dead." :)
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Election Protection
One of the more interesting law school opportunities I've seen is "election protection" (EP). EP is voter hotline or field assistance (not exclusively legal in nature) prior to and on November 4.
"Am I registered to vote?"
"Where is my polling place?"
"Do I need a photo ID when I vote?"
"I've been 'challenged'--what do I do?"
"The polls aren't open and they should be. What's happening?"
(The latter two are escalated matters.)
I'm excited about volunteering. Elections and voting rights have been a particular passion. I see few opportunities to make democracy work so that elections are legitimately fair, I am moved to do what I can (especially to safeguard againist another 2000 election; I've rarely known such disappointment in my life.) But I can't help but notice...
There was underlying racial tension at the training event I attended this week. Largely, some white volunteers were skeptical of the persistent questions some black volunteers (including myself) about resolving certain problems that may have more pernicious consequences. By this I mean, some of us wanted to know how to address problems linked to institutional issues that could lead to disenfranchisement or more subtle coercion by bad actors (poll watchers, biased poll workers, etc.). Specifically, we had reviewed how to record "challenges" made by third-parities to a voter's status, but we never discussed how we actually responded to the voter or even had knowledge what his or her rights were. I did not fully appreciate at the time that such a question was a launch-pad :)
After some back-and-forth, one white volunteer rebuffed another black female volunteer's concerns (she had worked in Miami) by saying "that doesn't happen here." So ignoring any hierarchy ettiquette (I was among a handful of students, non-lawyers) I impulsively jumped in--I've been a poll worker in Northern Virginia for three elections in which we had improper challenges and poorly informed election officers (who I had to correct, sometimes) leading to questionable decisions and results. There was no direct response to my comments.
And what could one possibly say? Life lesson: lawyers make a LOT of assumptions.
November 4th is near. God Bless America.
"Am I registered to vote?"
"Where is my polling place?"
"Do I need a photo ID when I vote?"
"I've been 'challenged'--what do I do?"
"The polls aren't open and they should be. What's happening?"
(The latter two are escalated matters.)
I'm excited about volunteering. Elections and voting rights have been a particular passion. I see few opportunities to make democracy work so that elections are legitimately fair, I am moved to do what I can (especially to safeguard againist another 2000 election; I've rarely known such disappointment in my life.) But I can't help but notice...
There was underlying racial tension at the training event I attended this week. Largely, some white volunteers were skeptical of the persistent questions some black volunteers (including myself) about resolving certain problems that may have more pernicious consequences. By this I mean, some of us wanted to know how to address problems linked to institutional issues that could lead to disenfranchisement or more subtle coercion by bad actors (poll watchers, biased poll workers, etc.). Specifically, we had reviewed how to record "challenges" made by third-parities to a voter's status, but we never discussed how we actually responded to the voter or even had knowledge what his or her rights were. I did not fully appreciate at the time that such a question was a launch-pad :)
After some back-and-forth, one white volunteer rebuffed another black female volunteer's concerns (she had worked in Miami) by saying "that doesn't happen here." So ignoring any hierarchy ettiquette (I was among a handful of students, non-lawyers) I impulsively jumped in--I've been a poll worker in Northern Virginia for three elections in which we had improper challenges and poorly informed election officers (who I had to correct, sometimes) leading to questionable decisions and results. There was no direct response to my comments.
And what could one possibly say? Life lesson: lawyers make a LOT of assumptions.
November 4th is near. God Bless America.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Friday, October 17, 2008
This Is What It Means To Understand You
Another passage from The Heart of the Buddha's Teaching by Thich Nhat Hahn. This one is from Part II, The Eightfold Path:
The Sixth Miracle of Mindfulness is understanding. When we understand something, often we say, "I see." We see something we hadn't seen before. Seeing and understanding come from within us. When we are mindul, touching deeply the present moment, we can see and listen deeply, and the fruits are always understanding, acceptance, love, and the desire to releive suffering and bring joy. Understanding is the very foundation of love. When you understand someone, you cannot help but love him or her.
A miracle, indeed.
The Sixth Miracle of Mindfulness is understanding. When we understand something, often we say, "I see." We see something we hadn't seen before. Seeing and understanding come from within us. When we are mindul, touching deeply the present moment, we can see and listen deeply, and the fruits are always understanding, acceptance, love, and the desire to releive suffering and bring joy. Understanding is the very foundation of love. When you understand someone, you cannot help but love him or her.
A miracle, indeed.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Gift of Sight
Meditation, for me, is more visually vivid than dreaming.
When I first began regular meditation last spring, I had a consistent vision. I would walk into a sterile white room toward a door. On the other side, I'd enter a most vital and beautiful garden. Splashes of color surrounded plush and fertile growth that spawn from beneath my feet many feet high. I'd explore and explore; and I'd always reach its end which appeared like a sharp cessation of the Earth. Only a sprawling sky was ahead. And always, I would jump.
This way I learned to fly.
Since my meditations have become increasingly visual, active and varied in their images. The only consistent image is when I begin. Instead of jumping from a cliff, I stand above what appears to be a rainforest waterfall, spread my arms, and simply fall. Like a film -- I see myself from one side, from above, and from the other side in three instant moments -- and I fall into water. I see myself meet the water from beneath in which the water is clear with a completely black background. When I make contact, the water's waves are neon blue, fusia, and orange colors. Momentarily, I feel this release. I begin from there.
Within meditation I touch suffering or conflict, large and small. I never intend to untangle it all but I find a starting point. A soft place to enter.
Above all, outside of meditation, I imagine all of my choices and their opportunities. When walking down a residential street this morning, I contemplated, "If I make thousands of choices everyday, I must see those thousands of choices that will alter my well-being." Such thoughtfulness feels like learning how to walk (really for the first time). I'm never certain to where my steps will lead, but I know each step to be true. For each choice I make with conviction, I cannot help but find myself where I want to be.
When I first began regular meditation last spring, I had a consistent vision. I would walk into a sterile white room toward a door. On the other side, I'd enter a most vital and beautiful garden. Splashes of color surrounded plush and fertile growth that spawn from beneath my feet many feet high. I'd explore and explore; and I'd always reach its end which appeared like a sharp cessation of the Earth. Only a sprawling sky was ahead. And always, I would jump.
This way I learned to fly.
Since my meditations have become increasingly visual, active and varied in their images. The only consistent image is when I begin. Instead of jumping from a cliff, I stand above what appears to be a rainforest waterfall, spread my arms, and simply fall. Like a film -- I see myself from one side, from above, and from the other side in three instant moments -- and I fall into water. I see myself meet the water from beneath in which the water is clear with a completely black background. When I make contact, the water's waves are neon blue, fusia, and orange colors. Momentarily, I feel this release. I begin from there.
Within meditation I touch suffering or conflict, large and small. I never intend to untangle it all but I find a starting point. A soft place to enter.
Above all, outside of meditation, I imagine all of my choices and their opportunities. When walking down a residential street this morning, I contemplated, "If I make thousands of choices everyday, I must see those thousands of choices that will alter my well-being." Such thoughtfulness feels like learning how to walk (really for the first time). I'm never certain to where my steps will lead, but I know each step to be true. For each choice I make with conviction, I cannot help but find myself where I want to be.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Love Is A Traveler
what you most want,
what you travel around
wishing to find,
lose, as lovers lose themselves,
and you will find.
Fariduddin 'Attar (1142 - 1220)
Sufi Mystic, celebrated as one of Iran's most prestigious poets
From Ninety-Nine Names of Love: Expressions of the Heart edited by Priya Hemenway.
what you travel around
wishing to find,
lose, as lovers lose themselves,
and you will find.
Fariduddin 'Attar (1142 - 1220)
Sufi Mystic, celebrated as one of Iran's most prestigious poets
From Ninety-Nine Names of Love: Expressions of the Heart edited by Priya Hemenway.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Sex +
This weekend my ever-politically conscience house hosted an event called a "clothing swap." Participants are encouraged to bring unwanted clothes and exchange them for others' unwanted clothes. Our clothing swap also included other activities, like hair-cutting, in an effort to encourage donations (a CISPES & Critical Resistance fundraiser).
If you entered the Hamilton abode on Sunday morning, you would have seen a clothing dozen piles throughout our three common areas. Shoes and other accessories were in the back "workroom" where I prefer to study. I was wading through shoes when I literally stumbled on a plastic bag.
I had tripped on a dildo. A dildo which looked eerily similar to the one I used to own. (Hm.)
As always, when in doubt, I ask Cyres about life's befuddlements. I ask, "Whose is that?" To which he replies with his usual unimpressed expression, "That's yours. We dug it out for the swap but since no one knew what it was made of, no one wanted it."
I looked down: I was still a less-than-proud owner of an unwanted dildo lying on the carpet beneath me. (I have real complicated feelings about dildos. More on this...sometime.)
At the Metta House, we call ourselves a "sex-positive" household. I was long-familiar with the idea, yet never fully knew what it was. So in an effort to be hip I did what any other curious but (at times) painfully shy person would do. I anonymously asked my housemates on our communal whiteboard: "How would you describe 'sex positive'?"
Of course Cyres wrote a reply (manifesto) that took up the entire board. His gist was that sex positivity was the affirmative response to a sexually repressive culture. I go through the checklist. Do I support comprehensive and age-appropriate sex education? Definitely. Do I acknowledge the broad range of sexual desires and choices that exist beyond heterosexual monogamy? For sure. Do I believe that consenting adults should inform and empower themselves about their sexual choices? Absolutely. Do I think that we, as a cultural collective, should encourage and facilitate sexual health? No doubt.
I've passed the test. But have I?
I often am very reserved and shy concerning the topic--sex. Although I gave a sociology presentation on "S&M" in college, suggested visiting a sex shop for a date this summer, and recently had a thoughtful conversation about sex, body image and gender, some people may consider me reluctantly sex-positive.
I've outed myself as a sexual conservative on more than one occasion. On a personal level, monogamy is my only option with my partner (with the expectation that I will have a life-partner); sex is contained within a monogamous relationship, in which sex is a means of reaching spiritual communion; sensuality usually prevails over sex; and a variety of sexual acts, like viewing pornography or masturbation, are never my recreation.
What's more is that I have trouble embracing certain types of sexual liberation. Indiscriminate sex, for example, or possessing many sexual partners, just confuses me. I have an intellectual understanding but I have never felt sexual liberation as independent from psychological, spiritual or psychic pain. I'm honestly not sure what this tension means.
I'll continue to reflect. Sex has been absent from my life for some time now and I do not intend to change this fact in the near future.
I am, however, surprised that I wrote this blog ;)
Simply Memoir
Today I attended a powerful workshop called "Writing Identities" led by Lori Tharps, author of Kinky Gazpacho. Designed for aspiring memoir writers, Lori explained the transformative nature of writing our own stories, why we seek to learn stories like our own, and how we go about starting the journey.
We begin with this: a memoir is not necessarily self-indulgent. Especially for those of us who have few stories which reflect our lives or appreciate the uniqueness of every story, memoir-writing tells truths in a culture that does not (story)tell nor accept truth. Memoirs possess the power to help heal, to expose, to challenge, to share. Contrary to "conventional wisdom" memoirs do not tell your complete life-story like an autobiography. Instead, they are thematic excerpts of any story that you wish to tell. Did you know that Maya Angelou has published seven memoirs?
During the workshop we completed a couple fun writing exercises. My favorite exercise was the "Six Word Memoir." I wrote: perpetually displaced youth builds spiritual crescendo.
What's yours?
Equipped with writing strategies and affirmation I will begin my first memoir tomorrow. I admit that this attempt is much more promising than this summer when I picked up a "how-to" book by an older white author. I simply didn't connect. Today's workshop was filled almost entirely with women of color with compelling and complicated histories.
During my introduction, I shared that over the years I'd become an activist-documentarian, and I believed it was finally time to document my own reality. After all, a thoughtful and talented friend reminds us: we cannot continue to make sense of the world without continuing to make sense of ourselves.
Read, write, share!
We begin with this: a memoir is not necessarily self-indulgent. Especially for those of us who have few stories which reflect our lives or appreciate the uniqueness of every story, memoir-writing tells truths in a culture that does not (story)tell nor accept truth. Memoirs possess the power to help heal, to expose, to challenge, to share. Contrary to "conventional wisdom" memoirs do not tell your complete life-story like an autobiography. Instead, they are thematic excerpts of any story that you wish to tell. Did you know that Maya Angelou has published seven memoirs?
During the workshop we completed a couple fun writing exercises. My favorite exercise was the "Six Word Memoir." I wrote: perpetually displaced youth builds spiritual crescendo.
What's yours?
Equipped with writing strategies and affirmation I will begin my first memoir tomorrow. I admit that this attempt is much more promising than this summer when I picked up a "how-to" book by an older white author. I simply didn't connect. Today's workshop was filled almost entirely with women of color with compelling and complicated histories.
During my introduction, I shared that over the years I'd become an activist-documentarian, and I believed it was finally time to document my own reality. After all, a thoughtful and talented friend reminds us: we cannot continue to make sense of the world without continuing to make sense of ourselves.
Read, write, share!
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Sustenance Which Kills
The Heart of the Buddha's Teaching, Thich Nhat Hanh.
[Four kinds of nutriments can lead to our happiness or suffering: edible food, sense impressions, intention, and consciousness. Regarding edible food, Buddha offered this example.]
"A young couple and their two-year-old child were trying to cross the desert, and they ran out of food. After deep reflection, the parents realized that in order to survive they had to kill their son and eat this flesh. They calculated that if they ate such and such a proportion of their baby's flesh each day and carried the rest on their shoulders to dry, it would last the rest of the journey.
But with every morsel of their baby's flesh they ate, the young couple cried and cried.
After he told this story, the Buddha asked, 'Dear friends, do you think the young man and woman enjoyed eating their son's flesh?' 'No, Lord, it would not be possible for them to enjoy eating their son's flesh.' The Buddha said, Yet many people eat the flesh of their parents, their children, and their grandchildren and do not know it.'"
R.
[Four kinds of nutriments can lead to our happiness or suffering: edible food, sense impressions, intention, and consciousness. Regarding edible food, Buddha offered this example.]
"A young couple and their two-year-old child were trying to cross the desert, and they ran out of food. After deep reflection, the parents realized that in order to survive they had to kill their son and eat this flesh. They calculated that if they ate such and such a proportion of their baby's flesh each day and carried the rest on their shoulders to dry, it would last the rest of the journey.
But with every morsel of their baby's flesh they ate, the young couple cried and cried.
After he told this story, the Buddha asked, 'Dear friends, do you think the young man and woman enjoyed eating their son's flesh?' 'No, Lord, it would not be possible for them to enjoy eating their son's flesh.' The Buddha said, Yet many people eat the flesh of their parents, their children, and their grandchildren and do not know it.'"
R.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
A Dream Never Dreamt
In the New Republic, I read an incisive article, Monsters' Ball: Global authoritarianism on the march, which made me pause about another startling global trend.
Kyrgyzstan, Turkmenistan, Lebanon, Thailand, Kenya, Nigeria, Democratic Republic of Congo, Philippines, Jordan (and others), all share a common political reality: grim futures brought by newly failed democracic governments. No part of the world has gone untouched or for that matter, unscathed, by democratization gone awry. Democracy may follow the way of colonial imperialism (some have yet to understand that imperialism is still immoral in any form).
The article surveys unique challenges each struggling nation faces installing historically-democratic institutions like free and fair elections within its own contexts. Ironically, as these governments have collapsed into more overtly repressive regimes, citizens have taken to the streets in protest, swelling in large numbers, and have effectively forced responsiveness from leaders--in part because there was no other choice. We see desperation drive democracy and democracy drive ever more desperation. How is this possible?
Well, like other distant analysis about worldwide democracies, American writers often omit that the first democractic experiment of modern times has not lived up to its rhetoric. Instead, we have exported our deeply distorted democractic "product" abroad.
So when will we know for certain that democracy has failed? What does a future without democracy and without capitalism look like after all?
Kyrgyzstan, Turkmenistan, Lebanon, Thailand, Kenya, Nigeria, Democratic Republic of Congo, Philippines, Jordan (and others), all share a common political reality: grim futures brought by newly failed democracic governments. No part of the world has gone untouched or for that matter, unscathed, by democratization gone awry. Democracy may follow the way of colonial imperialism (some have yet to understand that imperialism is still immoral in any form).
The article surveys unique challenges each struggling nation faces installing historically-democratic institutions like free and fair elections within its own contexts. Ironically, as these governments have collapsed into more overtly repressive regimes, citizens have taken to the streets in protest, swelling in large numbers, and have effectively forced responsiveness from leaders--in part because there was no other choice. We see desperation drive democracy and democracy drive ever more desperation. How is this possible?
Well, like other distant analysis about worldwide democracies, American writers often omit that the first democractic experiment of modern times has not lived up to its rhetoric. Instead, we have exported our deeply distorted democractic "product" abroad.
So when will we know for certain that democracy has failed? What does a future without democracy and without capitalism look like after all?
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